No, this isn't about tea, but just musing as I sip.
so I decided to go to the mall to walk
and use my Barnes and Noble gift certificate, a gift from Christmas.
As I walked I realized how often I say NO to myself.
No you can't have that, No you can't go there, No you can't eat that.
How often do you say "No" to yourself?
How does it feel?
I started this thought a few weeks ago and after paying attention
I realized saying "No" to myself comes from a very sparse childhood.
A childhood where I used my babysitting money to buy my own bicycle,
a used and battered bike from a junk store.
I painted it with a can of spray paint.
Then once I learned to sew, my money went to the fabric store.
Now these are not bad things and they definitely formed who I am;
but it also caused me to be cautious and tell myself "No" a lot.
PS - I think this came from being told "No" too.
PS - I think this came from being told "No" too.
If there was something I saw that I loved, I turned my head away and said "No".
I would tell myself I don't need that in my life,
I don't need to treat myself special.
I have to laugh because recently thinking on this I was visiting a friend,
in her bathroom she had a stand to organize and hang her earrings.
Well I normally wear the same earrings because who knows
where my other ones are. No organization here on that one.
Seeing her cute little stand I realized I never looked at cute little
earring stands. I just told myself "No, I don't need that".
Well I went right out and bought one.
What a lifting of the spirits and I have all these new earrings to wear!
Do you do this or is it only me?
Still musing over my tea with one of the few addictions I allow myself.
Magazines allow me to dream a bit, but at the same time
I say it gives me ideas of how to use what I have.
I don't allow myself to notice what I don't have.
I would love to read your thoughts.
Do you tell yourself "No" often?
I will be musing on this going forward.
Certainly no answers here except to notice when we do it.
We deserve the best in life, even if it is just a good cup of tea and a magazine.
Dream away, dear friends!
Have a terrific weekend!
I would tell myself I don't need that in my life,
I don't need to treat myself special.
I have to laugh because recently thinking on this I was visiting a friend,
in her bathroom she had a stand to organize and hang her earrings.
Well I normally wear the same earrings because who knows
where my other ones are. No organization here on that one.
Seeing her cute little stand I realized I never looked at cute little
earring stands. I just told myself "No, I don't need that".
Well I went right out and bought one.
What a lifting of the spirits and I have all these new earrings to wear!
Do you do this or is it only me?
Magazines allow me to dream a bit, but at the same time
I say it gives me ideas of how to use what I have.
I don't allow myself to notice what I don't have.
I would love to read your thoughts.
Do you tell yourself "No" often?
I will be musing on this going forward.
Certainly no answers here except to notice when we do it.
We deserve the best in life, even if it is just a good cup of tea and a magazine.
Dream away, dear friends!
Have a terrific weekend!
7 comments:
You are reminding me to tell myself yes. I prefer the word yes to no. Recently I saw a gorgeous large mirror in the home of a friend and decided to install one in my home, now that is a big yes. We both got good ideas from friends, you with your earring stand and me with my mirror.
Rather than tell myself "yes" or "no", I'm taking more time to think about why I want something and going on from there. I am telling myself "yes" more when it comes to spontaneous outings rather than being tied to "well, I was going to do laundry/cleaning/chores, etc." Much more fun!
Yes, I tell myself "no" often. It all started when I was a stay at home mom, and money was always tight, so I had to be pretty frugal. But through the years as our income increased, I treated myself now and then, but still had that sense of not blowing money on unnecessary things. I'm so glad you got your earing holder. Did you buy the earrings too, or were they ones you had? Now, I'm going to treat myself to a magazine. I've been wanting one, but haven't found one that said "buy me" yet haha. Loved this post, Marilyn, and it made me think how important it is to treat ourselves once in awhile. It does us a world of good. : )
~Sheri
I was brought up just after WW2 in maternal grandparents' home when food rationing and being careful with money was the normal experience. I've never lost that sense of needing to be frugal and serious about life. Further life experiences have reinforced this so it's not easy to change, relax and do something to treat myself. A thought-provoking post Marilyn!
Hi Marilyn - I have been away from blogging since we moved four years ago. I was so happy to see you still here. I too often say "no", usually feeling it is an extravagance. And money could be spent more responsibly. Yuk!! I am going to rethink that thanks to you. :-)
Love, Gail
peace......
I need to tell myself "no" much more often than I do. No to many things. (Mostly sugar and bread!)No to that thing from Home Goods (whatever it is that day) I don't need and don't really know what to do with. I admire your self control. I have little.
Wow... Marilyn! I love and appreciate when you dig deep and share the vulnerability! So much of this resonated with me. I've been my own worst critic all my life, my own inner-bully bossing me with "NO"... While there was love at home, my Dad's explosive behavior often came with the words NO. I heard NO so much that YES hardly ever seemed possible. Yes wasn't something I could count on. We didn't have a lot of money growing up, so a sense of needing to be frugal was always there. There are times--even now--when it still seem like I have to have some kind of permission for things, it's still sometimes a "battle"... learning to treat myself well is game changer in middle age! Mostly I'm learning to shine more! :) Thanks for helping to get in touch with our inner sparkle! ;) ((HUGS))
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